She Who Bumps Into Things

and notices . . .

In March 2024 I took an iconography class, a neophyte participating in the “writing” of an Orthodox icon under the guidance of an established iconographer. I am not Orthodox. I never painted representationally. I never heard of Saints Felicity and Perpetua. What interests me is the spirituality that accompanies this ancient art, full of symbolism and for some, sacred objects (icons) worth beholding. I immersed myself with a small cadre of people who knew this was worth their Saturdays and were willing to pay for it.

My can-do anticipation soon enough bumped up against “reality” after a few sessions—I don’t have the skills to paint two saints on a wooden panel with elaborate folds in their garments and faces increasingly illuminated full of light inviting your gaze. I couldn’t pull it off. Duh? You would have told me so! However, I dove in. Head first. Woke up. A bit humiliated (I skipped the last class!). Although many insights came from this experience, I learned something about myself that I never knew.

I love to mix acrylic paint!

This insight led me to a new practice of discovery that has become part of my life (at least for now).

Note about my art: A love for mixing colors doesn’t easily translate into creating art that’s appreciated by the maker or the viewer. I’m new at this painting life (August 2024). As you can see, the above image turned into a muddle of a mess UNTIL . . .

I saw her. There she was in the upper right hand corner! She showed up before I noticed as I intuitively dipped my brush onto the palette, orchestrated without intention various swipes of my hand—marks upon a blank canvas that took on an unintended likeness. What a surprise! Who is this?

When you bump into something you didn’t expect to happen, take the time to notice. It may take a minute or two, days, months . . . for this unsolicited gaze I waited for over a year. And only today, as I am about to publish these thoughts, I realize I painted an icon tailor-made for my eyes only. You may say, “So what?” That’s for me to decide and you to wonder (or not). She’s staring at me right now.

Just notice what you bump into in your ordinary day. And keep on noticing. It may just surprise you.